Grandma and Ken,
I've read your story several times, trying to figure out what I thought about it. At first I thought it was a nice love story, and I didn't understand how God figured into any of it. I thought maybe you bonded over God the way some people bond over music or art, as a hobby or interest. And of course there was all the hurt feelings surrounding the story which made it harder for me to see this as a story of God's intervention, and more a story of love. Lately in my World Literature class we have been discussing "Crime and Punishment", one of my favorite novels. Dostoyevsky, the writer, was Christian, and this is a psychological novel about sin and redemption. The main character of the novel is a criminal, who finally reconnects to society and finds his conscience (and perhaps even God) through the redeeming love of a self sacrificing prostitute who follows him from hiding out to prison. It is a dark, haunting, but ultimately hopeful story. And rereading your story, I am reminded of this book. I think love has a redemptive power, and I do believe in your story and in Dostoyevskys story. I was moved to tears when I thought about how powerful God can be inside of people, to motivate them to sacrifice so much to save someone else.
I still haven't found any kind of religion in my life. Maybe someday I will, but mostly it feels that people are filled with empty words. I can not say I'm a believer because it is how I was raised, or because it seems like the right way to be. I have to be moved, in some way, for me to honestly feel it. There are some lyrics from a song, "Secret of The Easy Yoke", that always move me and sort of describe how I feel:
"Could someone please tell me the story of sinners ransomed from the fall.
I still have never seen You and somedays I don't love You at all."
That is your story. I've found it inspiring, and I hope other people do too. I'm trying to do what is right and I'm trying to believe, in my own way and in my own time. I just want you to know that your story helps me, the way Dostoyevsky's writing has helped me and the way some great lyricists have helped me. I admire and aspire to your deep level of belief and trust in God. Thats really all I wanted to say... Love, Jenifer